he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
