Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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