so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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