Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
