No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
