hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
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