that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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