You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
