If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
