Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
