We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
