I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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