That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
People in love make me want to vomit
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
