so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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