A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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