im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
