I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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