I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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