I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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