one might say we're banned from that church
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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