it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
