Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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