Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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