Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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