Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
