Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
