i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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