hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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