Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
