i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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