He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
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