omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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