just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Randomize
