this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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