Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
