Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
