he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Enjoy the penises
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
