No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
