You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
