I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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