You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
You're like the curious george of whores
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
