I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
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