I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
