No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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