so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
