do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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