Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
