no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
