I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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