she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
